Her name is Willa

Just whipped this up in the last half hour, sorry if anyone was hoping to hear about the odd character in the medicine cabinet, this is a new story line. Also going for the third person on the advice of one awesome Rachel.

Willa looked around the kitchen for her husband. Fritz’ car was in the garage when she pulled in so she knew he was home. As she scanned the living room she saw him out the front window in an animated conversation with their neighbor, Evan. Willa sighed with mild dread figuring Fritz, who can’t say no to anyone. was gettingĀ  roped into yet another block party. She darted upstairs hoping that neither Fritz or Evan saw her through the window, the last thing she wanted to do was get roped in herself.
It’s not that Willa doesn’t like her neighbors, Evan is a fine fellow (when he and his children stay in their own yard), she just has a strong aversion to organized neighborhood activities. Or as she once called them, “Evening small talk with screaming children in the background.” If she had to pretend to find one more sticky, snotty, loud child “so cute,” she would literally puke on the communal lawn. She often fantasized about getting utterly smashed at one of the community events and teaching the sticky kids a few choice phrases to share with their parents. That would stop the invitations. It would also disappoint Fritz who not-so-secretly liked the Grill-a-Thons, Corner Swaps and Block Parties. So Willa resigned to keep her wine (bottle) drinking indoors.

Willa heard the front door close, assuming it meant she was in the clear from neighbor-time she shuffled back downstairs. “Willa, Willa-Bo-Billa!” boomed Evan as she rounded the second flight of stairs. Willa bit her lip before she yelled, “Oh Mother fucker!” in response to Evan’s unwelcome greeting. “Oh Evan, Hey!” Willa responded instead in her best Stepford Stapleton wife voice as she reluctantly met the men in the kitchen. Evan grabbed Willa into a large bear hug as he shouted as if she was still on the second floor, “You guys are really saving our behinds tonight!” “We are?” Willa asked as she sent dagger eyes Fritz’ way. “Oh yeah,” Evan said, “our softball team, The Stapleton Swingers, we are tied for the neighborhood cup, this being our last regular game, we could make it to the championship. That of course was until both the Jacobson’s and Vaughn’s caught that bug that’s been going around with the kids, you know. If you guys wouldn’t have agreed to jump in tonight we would have had to forfeit. So yeah, you’ve saved all of our behinds.”



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